Maddy’s Amazing Turn-Around!
June 14, 2010
doncobb
I believe that Autism has to do with the brain, and the physical structure of the brain. I don’t really know; no one really knows, but my observation about the Autistic’s lineal thinking leads me to believe it has to do with the physical construction of the brain.
That said, let me tell you about the most amazing transformation I’ve ever witnessed, and working in the recovery field, I’ve seen hundreds if not thousands of mind-boggling transformations through 12 Step therapy.
My little girl Madison is 11 now. We didn’t even seek a diagnosis till she was 9, as the public school system convinced us that Maddy simply had a learning disability. She walked late, talked late, seemed to be developmentally about 2 years behind her peers, generally speaking. But there were more symptoms showing up every year, including her inability to answer simple questions much of the time. We could tell from our interaction with her that she is definitely bright and musically gifted. She would hear a song one time at church and come home and plunk the melody out on the piano with hardly a mistake, and no formal piano training! Still, there were many times when I would ask her a simple question and she would stare back at me, as if trapped inside. I would ask her “Do you understand the question?” and she would nod her head “Yes”. I would ask her “Do you know the answer?” and she would again nod “Yes”. I would then ask “What is the answer?” and she would just stare back with a slight frustration in her eyes, as if she just couldn’t say it…and she couldn’t.
There were more symptoms. She was the most patient child I had ever met. She would sit for hours sometimes while we did things like church or visit our friends. One time I went to a book signing for an old friend and there ran into another old friend who used to be my best friend in high school. After the signing, we went out to my car, Maddy sat in the back seat (she was about 8 or 9), my friend sat in the front with me and we talked. Almost 2 hours went by as we reminisced and suddenly I remembered her sitting in the back seat. I turned around and said “Are you alright, honey?” and she nodded to me. She hadn’t made a peep, and has never complained EVER when she has to wait for anything. Totally unusual for a child her age, wouldn’t you agree?
When we got a report from the school that Maddy was spending her entire lunch hour standing next to a tether-ball pole by herself, it broke my heart completely! First I wondered how long that had gone on. I knew she would not initiate play, but when asked she always joined in like any other child. Learning that she was being allowed to just stand there by herself because she was unable to bring herself to ask other kids to play broke my heart and set off an alarm.
Another symptom: When Maddy played league soccer for the first time, her Autism rendered her incapable of just participating in the game. I spent the entire season running alongside the field because when the ball went downfield and all the other players ran down there, she would just stand there where she was. I learned that when I ran out toward her, telling her to run down there, when she saw me coming she would take off too. Finally, the refs told me I had to stay off the field so I figured out how to run alongside the field and that worked, too, to get her to take off. Once she ran down there, she was all in the game until the play stopped. Then she stopped, until I started running again. Totally an Autism thing.
Maddy is the sweetest little girl in the world. Not because she’s mine, but because she’s naturally sweet spirited, has never lied to us (That’s right, I said NEVER lied to us), doesn’t manipulate us or anyone else. She’s not wired that way. She’s sweet and kind, thinks of others a lot and is fun for kids to play with because she’s fairly passive in whatever they want to do much of the time.
When we read that report, along with the other symptoms she had (at 9 still not fully potty-trained successfully despite our best effort and two specialists, for example), I went to the school and asked how long she had been standing by herself alone during lunch time, and asked why I hadn’t been told sooner. I told the school psychiatrist that I had a list of symptoms we had been documenting and that they seemed to point to Autism. The psychiatrist assured me that Maddy simply had a learning disability and that was all I needed to hear.
My wife arranged for us to have Maddy diagnosed at North Bay Regional Center, despite our being warned that she probably wouldn’t get a diagnosis, as she was too high-functioning. She was diagnosed with PDD-NOS, on the Autism spectrum.
From that day forward, Maddy and I have prayed virtually every morning. When she gets up, she comes into my studio and lays across my chest and I pray the same things every day since she was diagnosed 2 ½ years ago, we have prayed EVERY DAY that a) God will fill us with His Holy Spirit, b) that He would fill us with His power and strength to do what He has for us to do (she couldn’t) and say what He would have us say (she couldn’t) in the plans He has for us that day, c) that He would make us more like Him and d) we pray His hedge of protection around us and our friends and family. We have prayed those prayers every day when she comes into my office each morning and lays down across my chest and we just hug and pray. She is also actively praying for Mommy and for me on a daily basis! She recognizes when someone is hurt or had surgery or whatever that THEY NEED PRAYER and she launches joyfully into prayer for them/us!
I can tell you that the services we’ve gotten from North Bay Regional are not completely responsible for her amazing transformation. We’ve taken Social Skills classes but they were always 4 ADD girls (opposite end of the Autism Spectrum from Maddy) and Maddy, so she never got the opportunity to open up. I watched videos of those classes and my heart broke when I saw how shut down she was around girls who were over the top. So it’s not the services from NBR, as much as we appreciated their making them available. We were willing to try anything to help her and NBR offered us a lot of help!
No, it was more than two-fold, this amazing transformation. First, my wife Dawn has poured herself into research around food and supplements and we started Maddy on B-12 Revitapops and supplements about 6 months ago. My wife has tried several different supplements along the way, but she seems to have found some that make a major difference. She’s been diligent about many things since Maddy was diagnosed, including setting up playdates with her friends in order to facilitate overcoming some of her social anxiety. Dawn found a way for Maddy to communicate with us at those times when she simply could not, as well. It’s called “Hangman”, and it’s worked absolute WONDERS to help Maddy communicate what she so badly wants to communicate. Sometimes it might just be “There’s a fly in my room”, as she has experienced some extreme anxiety about flies since she was little, although less so today. “Hangman” has solved those times when Maddy simply cannot voice the words of her concern. It’s been amazing to see her launch into it when we realize she can’t tell us something and ask “Hangman?” Her little face lights up and she lays out the words and it takes but a minute for us to decipher what she so badly wants to communicate with us!
My wife has been stellar, and a wonderful Mom who has devoted uncounted hours researching, reading, communicating with other parents of children with Autism and bringing in supplements and dietary supplies to help our little girl! Madison is as blessed to have Dawn as her Mother as I am to have Dawn for my wife!
Secondly, our Lord, Jesus Christ, in all His glory and power and Love has answered our prayers and set her free from so many symptoms which used to restrict her ability to interact with others! I am absolutely convinced of this. I’ve watched it.
Another major change in the past 6 months that has contributed to her symptoms virtually disappearing (that’s right, I said her Autism symptoms have virtually ALL disappeared!) is that since she first started singing praise songs with me and my band The Message (themessageproject.com) a few months ago, first at Sebastopol Christian Church and then at Celebrate Recovery meetings several times now, she has stepped OUT of her Autism, almost completely! Her social anxiety is GONE! She is a bubbly, fun-loving, gregarious, playful little girl now who responds to people’s hellos and thanks them for their compliments! She NEVER did that before! It’s amazing what change has taken place in her since we began singing. I believe its two things: 1. God inhabits the praises of His people, so He is INHABITING HER like never before, and 2. The power of Jesus Christ through prayer!
I saw an article about another little girl with Autism on Tangle.com/GodTube.com who was singing Opera. She was about Maddy’s age and her mom stated the same thing: When her daughter started singing, her social anxiety melted away!
Another important change that occurred right around the time Maddy experienced her miraculous recovery from most of her Autism symptoms is that we had been involved with Lorna Catford’s CATS (Collaborative Autism Training & Support) program at SSU (Sonoma State University). Lorna has assigned college-age girls in her program to spend 2-3 hours per week hanging out and connecting with these children with Autism. We were assigned this amazing and wonderful girl named Brandi Watts, who showed up faithfully and who Madison totally connected with! She would come over and talk with Maddy, at first Brandi did all the talking due to Maddy’s social anxiety, but soon after this began, Maddy opened right up and this amazing transformation took place.
It’s phenomenal, this change in Maddy in the past 5 or 6 months. She hasn’t hit puberty yet, so it’s not that. I’m convinced that our love and faith and The Lord’s power has set this girl free from those Autism symptoms which she has experienced her whole life! I also know that the Revitapops, the Kirkman supplements (Children’s Chewable Multi-Vitamin/Mineral Wafer with Xylitol) and Lorna Catford’s CATS program all played a part in bringing Maddy out of so many Autistic symptoms.
If you have a child with Autism, I highly recommend you begin praying over your child daily, even if you aren’t a pray-er. Do it. You’ll never know if it might help draw your child out of where Autism has them right now unless you try prayer. Never give up. Try everything. Make it your life. Give up other things so you can spend time with your children, even if they are nonverbal! They hear us. They’re thinking. They want to talk to us. They want to respond. They just need us to help them figure out how to get it done. Never give up.
Please comment so I’ll know how to pray for you, won’t you? God bless you! We love you Jesus!
Entry Filed under: Autism families
4 Comments Add your own
Leave a Reply
Trackback this post | Subscribe to comments via RSS Feed
1.
Robert Palley |
June 16, 2010 at 4:13 am
I alway try not to stare at her when we eat pizza wednesday night, but from the first time I saw her, I was amazed at how unusual and gifted a child she is. I can tell, because I was the same way.
2.
doncobb |
June 16, 2010 at 8:26 pm
Amen, Robert!
3. AUTISM: We Do Recover! &l&hellip | February 19, 2011 at 1:38 am
[...] is more information at Joined At the Heart about Madison’s amazing recovery from her Autism symptoms. We did some distinct and [...]
4.
brandi watts |
February 19, 2011 at 10:35 pm
Don, I am soooo thankful that God worked his magic on you family and my heart! Lorna Catford’s program was a blessing and I thank my lucky stars daily to have such wonderful people in my life! I would love to take part credit in Maddy’s disappearance with her symptoms but I honestly had nothing to do with it. I just wanted to be her friend and let her do the talking! The activities and games we did were because they were her interests, not mine. Lorna’s class taught me simple ques of ice breakers but Madison certainly did the rest herself! I just listened and watched in awe as she came out of shell!!
Madison has come along way and this is only the beginning!! She is amazing, bright, beautiful, creative and the light in my eye! I am blessed to know her. I am blessed to consider you all family and I am truly blessed to have your daugter change me to be a better person. I never thought it was possible for someone who is half my age, to be one of my best friends! I love you all and thanks for being so awesome! God Bless!!!!!
-Brandi